Wednesday, June 21, 2006

You Can't Handle The Truth!!!

Some people love the Iraq war, some people hate it; and whichever side you fall on, you are entitled to your opinion. But one thing we probably all agree on is the fact that our troops are heroes, defending our freedom against those that hate it. Yes, we've all heard the stories about the torture (as though torture is a bad thing) and the killings in Haditha, but bad things happen in times of war, and the fact that the liberal media and Democrats continue to harp on one or two examples of misbehaving soldiers (and who really knows if the stories are true, anyway, since Muslims are scheming liars) is another clear example of the Devil attempting to tear down institutions worthy of God.

Since the war first began I found myself pondering what, exactly, has made our men in uniform so heroic. Then I read this (and this) about the military being a place where evangelicals thrive and spread the word of God freely. This certainly has given our men the strength to wield the righteous sword of God against our enemies. Not that the spread of the Christian faith in the military is without its enemies. And then I read this. So not only is the belief in the Lord Jesus Christ rampant among our soldiers, Christian values are being institutionalized by the Pentagon, itself! Homosexuality IS a mental disorder, and what other company or institution in America has the strength to speak such truth this day and age? And I have no doubt that these examples of the Christian Way being embraced by our armed forces is the soul reason they have been so successful at defending our freedom and turning regular, small town guys into heroes.

But that isn't really the point of this post. No, as I've watched the constant suicide bombings and our ineffectual and Satanically-corrupt politicians bungle the war in Iraq, I've come to the conclusion that the military needs to be brought home. Not that I'm against a war in Iraq, per se; for I have no doubt that using the heroes of our armed forces to convert the heathens in Iraq to Christianity would be an honorable and good thing, certain to prevent terrorism forever more. But the fact of the matter is, the secularists and liberals would never let our military be used for such a righteous cause. So rather than waste precious lives giving Muslims freedom to worship a heathen God, we need to bring our boys home to fight the sin and filth that has worked its way deep into the foundations of our society. They could be used to go door to door to search for signs of sin, like pornography, same-sex couples, and rock and roll; they could be used to root out the tools of the devil, like secularists and witches, like those who oppose our army being used as a force for good. Not only this, but we could take advantage of the same power that converts your average middle american boy into a hero and turn the sinners of this country into God-fearing Christian heroes. What I am imagining is something not unlike a combination of the movies A Few Good Men and Glory. All of those rounded up in the purge of Satan's influence would be forced to join the military and the draft would be re-instituted. I realize that many of those newly pressed into service will be disobedient and turn a deaf ear to the glories that the military has to offer. That is why we would then take a page from the movie A Few Good Men and call Code Red after Code Red on the obstinate, beating them into submission. Homosexuals, witches, secularists -- they may fight, but with rags stuffed down their throats and their bodies beaten with bars of soap wrapped in towels, they would quickly forget their addiction to the Devil. After a few months I have no doubt that we will have turned these lost souls that nobody thought would ever amount to anything wholesome and good into an elite fighting force. It's this kind of thing, this kind of sacrifice, that true freedom -- freedom from eternal hellfire -- requires.

Saturday, June 17, 2006

Bad Poetry, Oh Noetry -- Homosexuals Shouldn't Be Allowed In Churches, to Marry or to Write Poetry

I came across this e-mail on the wolf-in-sheep's-clothing, Andrew Sullivan's blog - the entire blog essentially a heathen rant by a homosexual and so-called conservative. Of late, Mr. Sullivan has been calling people like me Christianists in a misleading attempt to group true Christians together with the Islamist terrorists that behead their victims and kill themselves to make a point. While true Christians certainly should not be above sawing the body parts off the truly evil (and then sewing them back on the wrong way or in a new area), like murderers and child molesters, we do not believe in the death penalty. Only God should be able to make the decision on life or death. Suicide is also evil. No, true Christians do not use terrorism to spread the Word of God, we try to use our faith and the miracles of good science (as opposed to the bad, like stem cell research, television and computers; really, for all the witches that read this site, I'd compare it to white magic vs. black), science that can control the way people think and act, that can monitor and ensure conformity to the Christian faith, to bring the planet back to God.

But that's neither here nor there, for the point of this post is tear down the false-hoods in the e-mail to Mr. Sullivan. First of all, one cannot be gay and be a Christian. It's specifically condemned in the Bible. Second, I'm offended by the comparison of the homosexual struggle to that of African Americans and the civil rights movement. One is the struggle of the diseased who could easily be cured if they truly accepted Jesus into their heart; the other was the righteous fight by one group of God's children against racism and segregation used against them by souls corrupted by the Devil. And finally, I'm really disgusted by the e-mailers terrible attempt to be poetic. With gems like "There have been days when I've felt the brush of God's grace through the warm, southern winds. And the sun rose like a thousand diamonds in the sparkle of the trees as I go on my long, crazy drives, praying to God" and "Perhaps the light will return, and the strong fragrance of the wind will be equally welcome as it was before. In a state where accents sometimes fall like flowers on the ear, it's sad to know that hatred can dwell so deeply in the heart" I wanted to vomit at the awfulness of it all. And not just because it was bad poetry, but because I know how the weak-minded and teenagers can be tempted to sin by such overwrought crap. I just wanted to scream out, "No! God's grace will flay and burn you alive with the burning, suffering hurricane of eternal hellfire. It will feel like a million nuclear explosions on your heart and eat you alive!!!" I wanted to tell all the dim-witted sinners that read his rubbish: "There is no sun that 'rises like a thousand diamonds in the sparkel of the trees' -- that doesn't even make sense: diamonds don't rise; I guess you could salvage the horrible attempt at imagery and say something like 'the sparkle in the trees was like a thousand diamonds' but it would still be awful and untrue, for in homosexual Hell there will be no sun, only the light of molten lava and giant geysers of flame." Then, finally, I wanted to assure those whose faith in Jesus could be shaken by the man's words, "That is not hatred in your heart -- that is the power of your righteousness rising up against affronts to God and our Christian way of life; it is a beautiful and pure thing blessed by the greatness and glory of God."

Thursday, June 15, 2006

Disabilities are a Sign of the Devil

Stephen Hawking, one of the world's premiere scientists, was just quoted as saying we humans must leave earth and inhabit other planets. This, of course, is evil, since, as those of you that regularly read this site know, space is actually heaven, and only those worthy to be in the presence of God may go there. It has been one of Satan's great dreams to one day return, and he has recruited scientists the world over to someday achieve this evil goal. I'm not sure what his intentions are -- perhaps to kidnap an angel and hold it ransom, perhaps to so dirty heaven with our germs that we ruin it for the heavenly beings that inhabit it, just as we did for the Indians with smallpox (although this analogy is not perfect, since that was a good thing, God's way of clearing the path for us to begin our manifest destiny). The most striking thing about Stephen Hawking though is how crippled he has become. This is certainly a sign that he has been possessed by the Devil. You might be wondering why all sinners aren't marked by this sign of the beast, and my best answer -- by no means the right one, just a hypothesis at this point -- is that not all sinners are literally possessed by the Devil. They are simply inherently evil or have been tempted to sin by one of the various methods Satan uses to corrupt our minds. It would make sense that the pure evil of Satan could twist our bodies and/or warp our minds. Or maybe the disabled, at heart, were once good, God-fearing men and women, only to be crippled in their losing struggle against the Devil. This could certainly be the case with Stephen Hawking, for notice the way he cannot even talk (look under the "Illness" heading). He has some sort of scientific device connected to him that speaks for him. So it could be that he refuses with all his might to do the bidding of Satan, only to be thwarted by technology. I'm not sure, really, what the exact answer is, only that disability is a sign of evil. It is especially important that we take notice of this in the post 9/11 world that we live in, for the consequences of allowing such evil close to us could be catastrophic. That is why the blind man made fun of by the President for wearing sunglasses is no laughing matter. There is no telling what, exactly, he was doing there -- maybe to kill the President or other important people within the government, maybe to steal state secrets by planting bugs throughout the White House -- all I know is that he was most likely up to no good, possessed by Satan for a reason. Beware.

There's Something Wrong With Outspoken Women

The natural place for women is in the kitchen. Their role is to serve man, make and raise babies. Women, of course, deny this, leaving the home, working, getting into politics, pontificating on things they know nothing about and/or don't understand. The perfect example of this phenomenon is Ann Coulter. As many of you have probably read, she recently called a few of the 9/11 widows harpies and accused them of enjoying their husbands' deaths. And of course this is nonsense. At first even I was convinced she was right, for my immediate response to the women's' outspokenness was to question their motives. And while I still question their motives, once I heard a women -- Mrs. Coulter -- parrot my own thoughts, I knew I must be wrong. It made me think: these women may have decided to leave their places as cooks and baby factories, but not necessarily because they were glad their husbands died. I mean, if my wife had died because I thought it was due to incompetence by the government, I would speak out too, and not because I was happy. These women, then, were inspired to speak out because of tragedy and deep impact had affected their lives. And that got me thinking: that's why all women deny their duty to God and husband. Including Ann Coulter. At the time, though I wasn't sure what affected Mrs. Coulter to such a degree that she -- a supposed Christian -- decided never to get married or have children (she is unmarried and barren, btw). Then I saw this. Her tragedy, her complex is that she grew up ugly and fat. Just look at her high school year book picture -- it is the image of dumpy, depressed ugly teenager, destined to grow up angry and outspoken. I'd be willing to bet that that's what inspired most women in this world to either not have children or leave their children defenseless against the Devil as the mothers joined the working world, to cast off the righteous and good demands of God. My suggestion to women that come across this post and get angry is that they go take a hard look in the mirror and recognize that there is beauty there, somewhere at least -- if not physically recognizable, then somewhere deep in their soul.

Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Dancing is Evil


I want all of you to know here and now that I do not approve of dancing. In fact, I wholeheartedly disapprove of dancing. The problem of dancing, particularly among youth, has been something our society has had to cope with for many decades. However, I feel dancing is more problematic now than ever. The problem of dancing is not just going to go away. We can either try to ignore dancing, or we can try to deal with the problem by passing laws forbidding it. For those of you who do not feel that dancing is such a big problem, then allow me to reeducate you, and if you will not be reeducated, then, God willing, I will some day be in a position of imposing a mandatory reeducation of all of you who are too permissive of dancing. Dancing is a great sin and a very horrible vice because it degrades the common morality and degrades traditional Christian values, and it encourages our young people to have sex. It also directly encourages homosexuality. Dancing is also responsible for abortions, because I am quite certain that more dancers have abortions than non-dancers. Most troublesome is the fact that when communities allow dancing, the dances become like a horrible cancer that grows and multiplies, eventually overtaking the entire community. And eventually, if left unchecked by a harsh and wise and good community Christian reverend, the dancing will turn the entire town into a cesspool of obscene gyrations and sexual perversion. If you don't think that this happens, and you don't believe that dances have the potential to spread like cancer across our towns and communities, then I suggest that you watch the movie Footloose. I also suggest that you remember the year 1996, which was the Year of The Macarena. That year, The Year of The Macarena, was, in my great opinion, a cultural nadir for this country and, from the standpoint of values and morals, one of the lowest points in our nation's history. That was the year that Bill Clinton was reelected and that Madeline Albright, UN ambassador, and later Secretary of State, stood up in the United Nations and danced The Macarena. Also, that evil man, former VP Al Gore, also danced The Macarena. The Macarena was an evil dance that spread across our land and around the world overtaking entire nations. I remember those horrible times all too well. It was a shameful time even for me, because I remember driving my SUV down the road when I accidentally tuned the radio to a station playing The Macarena, and when the song played, I remember sitting there in the SUV and the beats and the rhythms of that evil devil music caused me to move and gyrate involuntarily in rhythm to the beat! Oh the shame!!! To this very day, I still beg the Lord for forgiveness for that indiscretion.

Now, I want to explain to you the social-cultural and secular forces that cause dancing to take over our communities. You see, when a new rock song or a new beat is inspired by the devil in the mind of some godless young person, that youngster will then play this music his friends and eventually market it to the whole community. The same thing happens with dancing. You see, when a new dance comes along, a few people will try it, like trying a drug, and that dance will then be tried by others, and it will eventually spread to youngsters all over the community because they think that it is "cool" or "radical" or "gnarly" or "Xtreme", as all of the so-called "Xtreme" teens out there would say. So, pretty soon, all of the youngsters are dancing in the streets, and in the homes and in the schools, and perhaps even in church! Picture it!!! Sex-crazed, drug-addled youngsters all hopped up on Pixy-Stix and MoonPies, committing acts of sin and vice, their sweating bodies pulsating and gyrating, and moving, and grooving to the devilish sounds of the latest beat!!! I call upon all of you to put an end to this insanity at once!

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Drive Sinners to Suicide -- They've Been Naturally Unselected

There's been a lot of talk of late regarding the terrorists who committed suicide at Guantanamo Bay, a.k.a. Gitmo. The best response I've heard yet came from the great talking head, Michelle Malkin. Despite my reservations and general distaste for the idea of women involved in and/or commenting on politics or any other world event (a distaste inspired by Peter's letters to Timothy in the New Testament), I've liked Mrs. Malkin since she voiced her approval of the Japanese internment camps during WWII. I know this will immediately draw cries of racism and other such nonsense, but one must understand that the Japanese were our enemies at the time, and nothing short of death is too harsh a punishment for them. Now I realize that innocent people were probably jailed, which is why I don't think internment was the most efficient way to punish those that conspired against us; however, I'm still impressed by the righteous lengths Mrs. Malkin is willing to go against evil. This shows that her heart is in the right place, even if she is mistaken. It also shows why God commands that women know their place.

Anyway, in response to the suicides of our terrorist prisoners, Mrs. Malkin said, "Boo-freakin-hoo," which, while certainly sounding harsh to moral relativists and people who accept sin, generally, if anything is not nearly celebratory enough. For it should be the goal of all Christians to either convert sinners to Christianity or drive them to suicide, and that is exactly the focus our laws should have. Of course some crimes, some willful disregard for the Bible is not as heinous as others, which is why the law should be such that minor sins or crimes should be met with some form of punishment that is certain to drive some to despair, but not necessarily to take their own lives. The hope is that the despair will drive them to the arms of Christ; but if it doesn't then they are destined to commit more sin which will be met with more punishment and despair until -- in the perfect world, at least -- they are driven to death. In fact, these laws don't need to be purely about punishment; they can affect the everyday lives of all of us. Like prayer in schools, for example. This is certain to deeply affect those whose hearts are fortified against God such that they get depressed. And this is good. Overtime, if they continue to reject Christ, this despair will only grow. It is exactly as it should be. I know this is a very hard argument for secularists to accept, so to them I say: just look at it terms of natural selection. These people go against the will of God, which is a miserable and impossible way to live. Therefore, they are being naturally unselected to live on this earth, which is supposed to be testimony and in honor of God. Just as the dinosaurs -- supposedly -- went extinct via natural selection, so too will sinners, one day.

As an aside, I may even be wrong about Mrs. Malkin being incorrect regarding the rightness of the internment camps. For read this about the Japanese suicide clubs. Perhaps it was an indirect result of the internment camps that somewhere, deep down, the Japanese learned about Christ and the greatness of the Biblical God. They'd be able to fully embrace Christianity but for the evil manga and japanimation they constantly watch; and unable to accept Jesus as their Lord and Savior, they kill themselves. Or maybe it is an example of why Mrs. Malkine is wrong, for these clubs are surely an example of an inherent goodness in the Japanese, an inherent goodness suppressed by Japanese culture.

A Christian Utopia

Well now, I sure did appreciate the great insights that Nathaniel had in previous posts concerning the use of humiliation as an effective tool for forcing people to live moral and godly lives. This is a most effective tool indeed! It would work well in practically all public venues: Public schools, churches, the justice system, the workplace, the home, the bedroom, and everywhere in between! You see, because of the Satanic tyranny of liberal activist judges, our government, at all levels, has become far too permissive. There are no longer any moral values codified in our public laws. This is unacceptable!!! Instead of laws that promulgate moral values and Christian virtues, our current system of laws instead promulgates a despicable burdensome Code of Regulations aimed at "protecting the public." Protecting them from what?!! Global warming? Pollution? Monopolies? Corporate Accounting "irregularities"? Securities fraud? HA!!! Every good Christian knows that these things don't exist!!! They are meaningless terms that were invented by liberals, communists, tree-hugging scientists, witches, and activist judges! The current system of laws and regulations is only effective at stealing money from the good, hard-working capitalists, who are God's favored people. Every good Christian knows that the only meaningful protection people need is the protection of the cross, so that they may be saved from eternal hellfire! And if anybody doesn't know this then they need to be brought in line! I believe that the shame and humiliation arising from public scrutiny of people's actions, as well as their thoughts and beliefs, is a most excellent tool for bringing people in line. And I believe the church can help accomplish this goal. Clearly, we must impose harsh corporal punishments in the public square for outright acts of sin and vice, or anything that degrades the moral values of the community, but this isn't nearly enough!!! Clearly, we must eventually find a way of monitoring people's innermost thoughts and beliefs, because your thoughts and beliefs are ultimately responsible for your actions. Therefore, I believe your actions, speech, beliefs, and innermost thoughts are all fair game for examination by the public, the government, and the church to determine of they ultimately degrade the common morality and wholesomeness of the community! So lets forget about this "protecting the public interest and environment" nonsense and instead focus all government authority on protecting the common morality! If we can prevent you from thinking unwholesome thoughts, than that would stop all forms of perversion, creativity, and non-conformist ideology. You may resent the idea of good and wise patriarchs such as myself monitoring your thought and beliefs. Well Tough!!! I don't care what you resent!!! And neither does the Lord!!! We are fighting a cultural war here people - A spiritual war!!! We are fighting a war for the soul of America!!! We can win this war by reorganizing our society into small Christian communities, centered around the community church, where everyone knows everyone, and everyone scrutinizes the actions and the speech of everyone, and talks to others constantly about these actions and speech. Good Christian women can be particularly useful in this regard. That way, any sign of immoral speech or non-conformist behavior will be quickly brought under public scrutiny, and it will be openly discussed and judged in the community, and in the public square, and in church, and that will ensure that any form of immorality or non-conformist behavior is quickly stamped out!!! Ah Yes! That is truly a grand vision of the most perfect Christian society. Just thinking about it inspires a poem....

Good morning good fellows,
What a glorious day!
Good morning Christian fellows,
Hold to virtuous ways!

Good fellows, have you heard?
Have you heard the latest word?
Betsy Ann McGhee,
Was terribly late for church!!

Betsy Ann McGhee,
Oh that Betsy Ann McGhee!
She has yet to find a husband,
Despite the age of twenty-three!!

May all good citizens take heed,
Of that Betsy Ann McGhee,
The church elders will be swift,
In punishing her misdeeds!!

Good Fellows, have you heard?
Have you heard the latest word??
That little sissy Joe Pea,
Wet his bed again last week!!

Sissy Joe Pea,
Oh sissy Joe Pea,
You were born terribly left handed,
And the town must punish thee!!

Have you heard?
Have you heard?
Have you heard the latest word??

Have you heard the latest word,
About Mrs. Francis Bittersby?
Her husband arrived home last week,
And the supper was not served properly!!

We must all sternly watch,
That Mrs. Francis Bittersby,
Lest she forget her proper role,
In the Christian family!!

Have you heard?
Have you heard?
Have you heard the latest word??

Monday, June 12, 2006

The Glories of Vegetable Farms

I got a few angry responses from my last post and I have to say that I am surprised. I honestly never would have guessed that people so willing to condemn the severely disabled to death would get upset over turning their bodies into something blessed. But I should have known, for people who believe in euthanasia are beyond saving from the grip of the Devil. At the very least I thought they'd subscribe to the old saying, "Waste not want not." In any event, now that I've heard these cries of outrage, I know I've come up with a great idea for the future. And it's made me flesh it out a bit (I'm in the process of writing a new story incorporating it, too). So here's what I'm envisioning:

Just imagine vast fields of our sisters in Christ -- sisters brain damaged and comatosed, never to mentally return to this Earth full of sin -- inserted into pods that are themselves connected to a myriad of wires and hydraulic tubes (I know, it sounds exactly like the Matrix, and I freely admit, although it's certainly a very evil movie, some of the imagery is inspiring and inspired this post). The pods will be the most comfortable places on Earth, playing soothing music like Bible hymns and Mozart, their insides like a massage chair and covered in silk. A few intruding wires and tubes will, of course, have to connect to the women inside the pods to monitor their temperature and overall health, as well as the babies' of those that are pregnant. And of course there will be one tube reserved for the insertion of a man's seed whenever the women are at their most fertile. And only the best semen will be used. I haven't quite settled on a selection process yet, but I'm thinking some sort of Christian council could perhaps vote on the man who is honorable and moral enough to breed generations of these children. Perhaps one man won't be enough, for a little bit of diversity is always good. We should, therefore, most likely have a multitude of different men, one of each race. When the children are born, they can be sent off to special adoption centers, where they can be delivered to good Christian parents who are unable to themselves breed. Those that may be left over can be raised in God, brought up in Christian schools, where prayers are said thrice daily (at least), and in the summer, they can be sent to Jesus camp. If the schools are as good as I envision, then these children will make the perfect leaders for our future. But not just leaders, for if this idea is near as good as I am thinking, we will breed enough of these children to one day make up a huge percentage of our population, such that they can elect only the most Christian of people to the government. So even those that are not the brightest and best can contribute to God in some way.

This is just an aside, but I was recently made to watch this "Japanimation" movie, Legend of the Demon Womb, that also inspired me in a related way. In the movie, there is this device, the Nazi Death Rape Machine, that could certainly be used as a punishment for women who abort children and especially heinous feminists. The machine looks not unlike a spider, and on each of its legs women are attached and molested. If we were to take the murderers that abort children and the severely God-less feminists and knock them over the head until they are sent into a vegetative state much like Terri Schiavo, we could then hook them up to such a machine. But this machine, unlike the one in Legend of the Demon Womb, would not be a monstrous rape machine, but would gently impregnate the sinners. I know most of you will be outraged at the idea, but you -- at least those of you that think it is okay to kill the vegetative -- are hypocrites; for why is it okay to kill brain dead, but not okay to turn their bodies into vessels for life? And that's the beauty of these ideas. We will be creating a culture of life, a culture so powerful that even women who in life turned their backs to God are brought under His wing. Perhaps this all sounds like science fiction, but even Christians have fantasies sometimes...

It's Never Too Late -- Even for Brain Dead Women

I read this article and it gave me hope. For it is proof that it is never too late for a woman to redeem herself in the eyes of the Lord. Where the activist judges of Florida condemned Terri Schiavo to death, we have the perfect example of why such a decision was evil. Just look at what this woman was able to accomplish, even in a vegetative state. She is a shining example of what can be done with all the brain-dead, vegetative, and/or comatosed women of the world. Rather than debate whether or not to pull the plug, we should be impregnating all of these women and turning them into baby factories. It is, after all, the duty of a woman to bear children and if the technology is available to accomplish such an important mission, then it should be used. Of course no one can be sure, but I am fairly certain that somewhere in the vacant minds of the vegetative each delivered child implants a seed of Christianity such that when the women are finally allowed to die, they will certainly be brought to Heaven. We give the homeless food and shelter, we deliver aid to needy countries across the world -- why should we deny charity to our brain dead women?

Friday, June 09, 2006

Assimilate or Else

President Bush recently said immigrants need to assimilate. This heroic speech reminded me of the heroes of Star Trek, also known as the Borg. I know the show built them up to be this evil empire, this alien race that sped around space, sucking up -- absorbing, assimilating -- all the universe's biodiversity and eradicating the freedom and differences of all its life forms, but the way I see it, they were really protecting Heaven from the unworthy. For as I'm sure I've mentioned before, there is no such thing as "space"; -no, what exists outside the Earth's "atmosphere" is surely Heaven. The Federation wasn't on this glorious mission of exploration, but instead was on a Satanic mission to invade Heaven. Not that many of the Federation's members believed in Heaven -- Picard, for example, was certainly one of these liberal "intellectuals" that explored space only to prove God does not exist. But what people such as he believed was of no matter to the Devil. And the Borg brought the wrath of God upon these sinners, doing God's work in protecting Heaven from intruders unworthy to even sniff the air of space/Heaven. At the same time they spread their message - certainly the message of the Bible -- and assimilated all those that crossed their path. I'm sure beneath the wires and cuts the "victims" of the Borg were in fact experiencing incredible joy given their newfound closeness to God.

Anyway, after hearing Bush speaking of assimilating illegal aliens into our culture, I was reminded of the Borg and it gave me hope that if perhaps we true Christians could properly organize ourselves we could be to the sinners of this country what the Borg were to the Federation. In fact, we should model ourselves after the Borg, drilling holes in and connecting powerful computer chips to all the world's people. I'm not sure what exactly these things did to the "victims" of the Borg, but in the real world they would certainly program people with wholesome Christian values and the teachings of the Bible. I'm sure the first generation of such technology won't be nearly advanced enough to accomplish such an enormous gift to God; however, it shouldn't be too hard to equip our first computer chips, to program our first version of software to administer shocks and various other types of pain to those that sin and to monitor the general population. Given all that we know about the brain and all the money big pharmaceutical companies have invested in developing mind-altering drugs, it should be equally possible to disable certain pleasure centers and things of that nature in people's minds. I know there will be those of you that doubt me, even among my Christian brothers. But thousands of years ago I'm sure people looked up at the night sky and dreamed of one day landing on the moon, and, apparently, we've accomplished that. Why not assimilation?

Wednesday, June 07, 2006

FMA? Homosexuals Have Already Won

I've been hearing a lot about this Federal Marriage Amendment (FMA) of late, and I'm offended. Not because our government has suddenly decided to respond because it's an election year, but because we should really be debating about the various ways we can eradicate the disease of homosexuality just as we talk about cures for cancer. It should be a given that gays can't marry. The only honest debate -- a debate not dictated by the Devil -- is one where we discuss things such as whether homosexuals should be kept in cages, castrated, or marked just as sure as the God-less will be condemned with the Mark of the Beast during the end times. That is why I recently enjoyed the movie X-Men III, for it was definitely an allegory about the problems with homosexuality every good Christian community faces here in America. And that is why I am disgusted about the current debate regarding the FMA and immigration. We are wasting resources sending unmanned drones to patrol our borders with Mexico; this technology should be deployed in places like Dupont Circle (in D.C.), NYC, San Francisco, and France. Surely we could be using this technology to install a Christian way of life throughout this great country of ours. Every time a drone spots a man kissing a man or a man skipping around in public in a dress our police forces could be dispatched to round them up and re-educate them in the ways of the Lord. Just imagine if we put the same efforts we put forth for things such as Social Security and health care -- utterly stupid and worthless ideas only the liberals controlled by the Devil are concerned with -- into destroying sins such as gay-ness. This whole travesty is just a reminder of why our government and the Constitution are useless, and why the Constitution needs to be burned and replaced with the Bible and our Congressmen should be dispatched in favor of Church Elders.

Tuesday, June 06, 2006

6.6.6.

I'm not one of these misguided Christians or evil Satanists who attaches Biblical meaning to June 6, 2006 simply because it equals the numbers of the Antichrist. While I know the End Times are inevitable, I don't subscribe to this belief that they will start on a given day, at the very least because I'm pretty sure that the End Times work like the Night of the Living Dead, where Hell gets filled up so the evil dead come back to earth and terrorize it, except, of course, that when Hell gets filled up in real life, the Antichrist comes back and begins the End Times. This being the case, there's no telling when Hell will get overcrowded, for it depends on the choices people make. That is why the good Doctor and I are obsessed with making the world a peaceful Christian place, even if it means horrific punishments, pervasive monitoring, and absolute control over everyone's life to ensure they live the Christian Way. That way we can be sure that people will make the right choices. This is not a fail-safe plan, I know, since just looking at today's society, where good Christians know what it means to be a good Christian and to live righteously, we are still faced with homosexuality, witchcraft, and all manner of sin; and where Satan has brainwashed even the smartest people into believing in freedom and democracy and privacy over the Bible, where women have been empowered to use their natural gift at evil and tricker-y to tempt man towards sin, it is inevitable that at some point we will totally succumb to Satan's ways and Hell will fill up some day. But that does not necessarily mean that today is that day, and given that the day is almost over with no Armageddon in site, I think it's safe to say that I'm right.

But I'm not 100% sure, so I still think it necessary to at least monitor certain things that occur today. Like babies that are born. At first I wasn't able to admit that I could be wrong -- perhaps because I am terrified that I will experience the End Times or that the people I know and love will be left behind to suffer such pain -- but then I saw things like this. Three armed babies are not a sign of good times to come. So I was thinking that it may be necessary to implant microchips in all the babies born today so they can be watched. It is also necessary that these children be brought up in special Christian schools to re-enforce the lessons of the Bible upon them. Every bad, non-conformist deed they commit as children can be met with some form of corporal punishment. This is necessary, for it might, just might, be the case that every baby born on this day is destined to form an Antichrist Army that will terrorize the Christians that are left behind. Perhaps by watching and controlling the movements of such evil beings we can minimize the suffering that Christians will experience during the end times. And if I am wrong, then no harm done, for as long as the microchip-ed live righteous lives they have nothing to worry about. But again, I'm not absolutely sure about this point.

Monday, June 05, 2006

Labor of Love - An Inspirational Message


What disturbs me most about those of you who disagree with our ideas is that you fail to understand that these ideas are inspired by the love and the goodness of the Lord. You people need to lear this NOW!!! This site is all about God's love and love for our neighbors. That's why its called jesusloveseverything. The reason we take the time to bring our message to you wretched people is because we care so much. Maybe we care a little but too much! And if caring too much is a sin, well doggone it, I guess I'm guilty, and I confess that sin to my Lord and Savior! But you depraved and wretched people need to realize that our ideas are inspired by the love of the Lord. And its only through the love of the Lord that our ideas we can force you to give up your sinful ways, and come under our authority immediately! You people had better see the big picture here! You had better learn the truth! This isn't about your so-called rights and freedoms! This isn't about what You want! The only thing that matters in this world is what's right and good and wholesome, and what is really the truth. And the only way you can learn what's right and good and what really matters is by praying and reading the Good Book, and confessing your sins to Jesus and praying to be saved. And maybe, if you are one of the good ones, you will be saved. And if not, then you are doomed for all eternity because your soul will be cast into the fiery cauldron of hell, where you will be slashed and burned and ripped and torn and whipped and and cut and crushed, and because the soul exists eternally, the eternal cycle of destruction will repeat itself anew!!! And so you will be slashed and burned and ripped and torn and whipped and cut and crushed again!!! And again!!! And again!!! Forever and ever!!! And the cycle will infinitely repeat itself afresh!!! Now bringing these wonderful and glorious messages to you people is a lot of hard work, but I can assure you that it is a labor of love! Yes that's absolutely right - a labor of love! What a truly glorious and wonderful thing!!! It's because of the love of the Lord and our love for our neighbors that we can send messages of hope and good news!!! We will have victory in heaven, if we all come together under one giant tent of Christian fellowship and completely subit unto the moral authority of the bible, which only people like us can bring to the table! Yes, may we all come together, our souls cleansed in the blood of Christ, and assesmbe as a new community under the grand tent of Christian fellowship to assemble at the great supper table for a wholesome supper, where we will feast on the wholesomeness of our good virtues and good deeds and biblical truths

Thursday, June 01, 2006

The Fall and Rise of Peter -- Another Story About the End Times (Part II)

In the days following the Rapture, Peter and Jez spent all their time together. But they did not touch. Never again would they touch, at least not until marriage. That is the way God wants it, they both knew, and not without good reason. For that is how women can control men and lead them to eternal damnation. Already the source of nearly all man’s impure thoughts (unless, of course, the man is homosexual and condemned to eternal hellfire without the help of a woman), all it takes is a single kiss, a single moment of hand holding, even, to enrapture him and trap him with the power of Satan.

But they wanted to touch, they wanted to hold hands, to kiss; and Peter wanted to once again feel Jez’s warmth, her softness, her wetness. But not until they were ready for marriage and children. And they were ready, he knew. How else could you explain his aching need to feel and be felt by her? What Peter did not realize, of course, is that such thoughts could easily be implanted by the Devil, that perhaps his passion was nothing more than lust, lust implanted inside him the very first time he touched her.
In the days following the Rapture, the people left behind began to organize. But with organization came disorganization, as those that realized their disastrous mistake and became true Christians were confronted by another group equally sure that aliens had been responsible for the sudden disappearance of the world’s true Christians. And the alien-loving secularists did not want to hear about Jesus and redemption, nor did they wish to hear about the seven Trumpet Judgments of the tribulation period or the seven Bowl Judgments of God’s fury during the Great Tribulation period. In fact, their minds were so corrupted by the Devil, good Christians were beaten for trying to spread the word of God. At the same time, reports that the United Nations was being handed all the levers of power in the United States made some restless and disturbed, while others – especially the liberals, the homosexuals and witches – happy, as though all the world’s problems could be solved by a One World Government.

And as the days passed, the alien-loving secularists became more and more abusive towards the Christians. The so-called protections of the Constitution applied even less during the turbulent times following the Rapture, and police officers and judges would simply laugh at complaints (and it would get worse, of course). To make matters worse, some people even celebrated the Rapture by fornicating in the street and exposing themselves to children, while homosexuals would walk the streets free to hold hands and kiss. Some even had the nerve to approach children with candy.

Luckily, though, Peter and Jez lived in a town where most people embraced Jesus in the immediate aftermath of the Rapture. They too suffered abuse at the hands of the secularists, but within the first few weeks decided to take action. And Peter listened as some of the newly elected church elders spoke, explaining the duties of all true Christians during the end times. Yes, Christians must attempt to bring as many people as they can to Christ before the Glorious Appearing. But some people’s attachment to the Devil was so strong Christ was an enemy in their eyes . For them, shame and humiliation was the only option, if only to teach those who could still possibly be born again a lesson.

Peter was the first to sign on to the new Christian Strike Force proposed by the church elders. On their first mission, they were able to capture three Mexican gang members. And Peter watched as his team leader burned them with cigarettes. Within a few minutes, one of them was ready to be born again.

Inspired by the scene, Peter, as though guided by God, through one of the remaining non-believers down on the ground. He then pulled out his knife and carved a cross on the man’s chest; and the man screamed in pain. But he would not confess. “Repent!” Peter yelled at him, but he could only mumble in Spanish. So Peter brought his knife up to the man’s eye. And at this the man began to pray out loud to himself. “Si! Si! Yes, yes, I love Jesus,” he then told the men in the room.

The other men in the room were so impressed by Peter, they surrounded the remaining non believer and took turns abusing him. But he would not repent. One Christian soldier even carved off the Mexican’s ear, yet still he would not confess his sins and embrace Jesus. “I love the Devil,” this sinner whispered between screams. So the men decided to bring him before the church elders.

And the elders decided the man needed to be publicly shamed. After much discussion, they described the punishment as follows:
1) first the man was to be brought to the town square and stripped naked
2) then carrots were to be stuck in his mouth and anus
3) after that he was to be caned seven times
4) finally, and just so everyone would know the man was filthy, Christ-less sinner, his nose was to be cut off.

As the punishment was being carried out, most in the crowd were overcome with sadness. Not because the Mexican was suffering great pain, but because his was surely a lost soul. Sobs could even be heard among the people, they cared so deeply for the lost soul.

It was after the public shaming that Peter proposed to Jez, who immediately said yes and broke their unspoken rule never to touch before marriage. But Peter was not mad, for he was filled with joy. And that night they were married.

In the bedroom they kissed, and Peter put his fingers into her. It felt like warm mud. Next he stripped off her shirt, then her underwear. He’d never seen a naked woman before, and it was a wonderful, indescribable experience. The love he felt for her at that moment, he thought, would certainly bring them a night of incredible passion, the kind only true love could create. But as he struggled to enter her, the moment became slightly uncomfortable; and with penetration the moment became even worse, as what once felt like warm mud changed into a sensation of worms crawling around on his manhood. What Peter did not realize was that God had cursed his relationship with Jez. Not because Peter was a bad man, but because: a) Peter, right at the moment of the Rapture, had succumbed to lust and b) Jez was not worthy of Peter. But as he exploded inside her, Peter was oblivious to these facts.