Saturday, November 19, 2005

Why Be Afraid of the Patriot Act: God is Already Spying On You

Since 9/11, a debate has raged across the country: how far should we go to protect ourselves from the heathen terrorists of the Middle East? Can we torture and humiliate them; can we deprive them of due process; can we pre-emptively invade Muslim countries that dare attempt to acquire nuclear arms and threaten Israel? And despite the attempts of the America-hating, cowardly left, the answer to these questions has been a resounding yes; and I watched with pride as the spread of democracy and freedom crushed Iraq and Afghanistan, as our heroic and honorable soldiers taught all the terrorists of the Middle East who is boss and sent Osama bin Laden and his ilk into hiding. While the cowardly and sensitive liberals were horrified by the images out of Abu Ghrab, of the pyramid of naked Iraqis, of the Muslims on a leash, I recognized that the spread of freedom and democracy is not something that can be learned in an area that hates Jesus, but instead must be forced down the peoples' throats.

But while I easily accepted that the rest of the world had to suffer and sacrifice in order for America to be safe from terrorists, I struggled with the possibility of our having to sacrifice. Of particular concern to me was the Patriot Act. The idea that the government could freely wiretap any computer or phone I use and have access to all of my records, including the books I check out of a library, really scared me. As Christians, we must vigilantly guard our freedoms, lest the secularists, homosexuals, and practitioners of witchcraft and sorcery prevent us from worshipping altogether. I was also worried, however, that the government might be over-reaching, attempting to become omnipresent the way only God can be. Our lives are already governed by a Heavenly Patriot Act, where God sees, hears, and feels everything we do and think. If we touch ourselves, improperly wasting our seed, God is spying on us. If we have impure thoughts, He knows what we are thinking, and He judges us. When we are in bed with our wives, girlfriends, and/or whores, He is there, watching with approval or disapproval, depending on the righteousness of our lust. When we lie, cheat, or steal, He knows. It's as though there is a camera linked to Heaven in every place we go, as though our brains are wiretapped by God.

My fear, though, has been put to rest, for we are fortunate enough to have a leader who speaks to God. Not only this, but President Bush is a born again Christian, so he would never abuse his power. Just as God commanded Moses to attack the enemies of Israel and massacre men and boys, He has commanded our President to kill terrorists. It makes sense, then, that our modern day Moses of a President be empowered to spy on us, to read our e-mails, listen to our conversations, and search our homes. In fact, God may have even given the President a special Heavenly device, where he can read our every thought and watch our every move. Just imagine that the next time you decide to sin OR commit terrorist acts against the country.


Anonymous pickledbabiestastelikechicken said...

close-mind·ed (klōs'mīn'dĭd, klōz'-) or closed-mind·ed (klōzd'-)

Intolerant of the beliefs and opinions of others; stubbornly unreceptive to new ideas.
close'-mind'ed·ness n.

EXAMPLE: "If you do not believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, and you do not accept Him as your savior, you will go to Hell."

11:06 PM  
Blogger okidot said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

1:05 PM  
Blogger okidot said...

You said ''I recognized that the spread of freedom and democracy is not something that can be learned in an area that hates Jesus, but instead must be forced down the peoples' throats.''
I find it amusing that you believe your are a good christian being, I believe christianity is the force of the devil in his most devious form.
He owns you and you think you are doing good. religion and beliefs are taring the world apart. If there is a god he gave up on all of us a long time ago. hahaha your blogs are the most ill-informed closed minded views i have ever stumbled upon.

1:07 PM  
Blogger Nathaniel said...

okidot -- i find it very very sad and disturbing that people such as yourself our allowed access to the world of the internet. the internet should be a place where people of pure heart devoted to Jesus congregate to spread the word of God. But you people have usurped it spread your filth. btw, religion is not tearing the world apart, it's the sin of the Devil that's responsible. sure we Christians could lay down as our values are pummelled, but we fight in the name of the Lord.

2:58 PM  
Anonymous ZAC said...

Finally we can agree on something here. I do agree with you on the first paragraph about how we must fight to protect ourselves from terrorists and about how wiretapping is wrong.I agree with you on most of the political writing, except for the last paragraph. Bush? You would stand up to that retard? I hope you mean a bush like that of which you find in a yard, because even that has more sense than the person. He led us TOO DEEP into a war that did need to be fought, but it has gone on far too long now. After we caught saddam, we should have left Iraq for Afganastan to find Osama Bin Laden, after we found him, completed our objective, we leave knowing that we have made the world a better place. That is all we nedded to do. he has kissed ass to the Illegal immigrants who shouldn't be here in this great country stealing our money and living free illegally. There is more, but I don;t think that this entire website has nerely enough bandwidth to hold all of the faults that this man has done.

By the way, I am not saying that John Kerry was any better, but how can someone lead a country into a war if they don't even know how to correctly say nuclear?

11:41 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Tell me this... IF your god allowed such evils thought history spread over the earth... Wouldn't that mean that your god would be just as evil as they? Riddle me that you single celled moron.

5:26 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

through out *

5:26 AM  

Post a Comment

<< Home