Sunday, November 27, 2005

The Scientist, Fetustein, and the Locusts: Yet Another Short Story About the End Times

"And the fifth angel sounded, and I saw a star fall from heaven unto the earth: and to him was given the key of the bottomless pit. And he opened the bottomless pit; and there arose a smoke out of the pit, as the smoke of a great furnace; and the sun and the air were darkened by reason of the smoke pit. And there came out of the smoke locusts upon the earth: and unto them was given power, as the scorpions of the earth have power. And it was commanded them that they should not hurt the grass of the earth, neither any green thing, neither any tree, but only those men which have not the seal of God in their foreheads. And to them it was given that they should not kill them, but that they should be tormented five month: and their torment was as the torment of a scorpion, when he striketh a man." -- The Book of Revelation

Wa Jie didn’t care what was happening to the earth. She didn’t care that her daughter had disappeared, that her husband had left her for his silly Christians, that her parents had nearly starved to death, surviving only because they found the decomposing bodies of their neighbors and ate them. She was a scientist. She had a problem to solve, and she’d almost solved it. In another era, her work would be condemned as evil, just as the Nazis’ was. But that was another era. Thankfully. Now things were different. People expected comfort. Pain, sadness, simple inconvenience – the world could not tolerate those anymore. Especially since the chaos, since the famine, earthquakes, and most of the world’s water turning to blood. So they – most of them, anyway – left her in peace to perform her experiments, experiments with unfathomable potential to finally prove that humans evolved from monkeys.

She took the bucket of fresh fetuses and emptied it into the vat. It was funny how things changed, how they evolved. As a young scientist, she was constantly having to explain herself. No, she would tell them, her work was not immoral. Fetuses were not life; they could not feel pain, etc., etc. Plus fetuses could rid the world of disease, of suffering. Many people listened; they understood at least one thing – the experiments could benefit them. She never bothered to explain that she wasn’t interested in saving the world from pain and suffering, that she cared about only one thing: the monkey-man connection.

She lowered the mixer into the vat of fetuses. But the Christians… They never listened. That stupid book of theirs… Oh, how it angered her. Impeding progress in the name of blind faith!!! She had diagrams; she had facts, had figures – all testable and tested by renowned scientists who couldn’t possibly be wrong. What did Christians have? The Bible? Because of that silly book it had been almost impossible to find the fresh fetuses she needed for her work. She combed the poor houses and hung around high schools to find poor lost souls willing to let her take their babies. And boy would she take them. She’d rip them right out, sometimes with bolt cutters, sometimes with coat hangers. She could have made it painless; but she was angry. She needed more fresh meat, and she was tired of having to argue. The government should have just given the fetuses to her.

She turned the mixer on and watched the fetuses spin into something that looked not unlike the remnants of a nose bleed from God. Those were tough times, but, yes, it was funny how things changed, how they evolved. After the “Rapture” – the disappearance the Christians attributed to God, but she knew was due to a rupture in the space-time continuum – and the subsequent tectonic and climatic chaos, she couldn’t keep the pregnant women away. The condemnation of the Christians certainly got louder, but the idea of having to bring up screaming, bratty children during the “end times” brought hordes of women to her back-alley lab to relieve them of responsibility.

She turned the mixer off and stared into the vat. Suddenly, it started to bubble and froth. This is not what her calculations led her to believe would happen! And then the baby mixture began to take form. She couldn’t tell, at first, what it was turning into, but gradually it began to take the form of a gigantic fetus. It looked kind of like Frankenstein, so in her head she dubbed it Fetustein. Waaaaaa! Waaaaa! Wiiiiiiitttttttccccchhhhhhh! it screamed at her. Then the fetus-mix baby -- Fetustein -- began to chant: Holy, holy, holy, Lord God Almighty, which was, and is, and is to come! And with the chant, she heard a loud buzzing approaching from outside the building.

Suddenly, the windows of her lab burst forth, and large, fierce looking bugs flew into her lab. As they approached her and she could see them more clearly, she noticed they were not really bugs at all, for while they had the shape of locusts, they had the faces of men and hair like a woman’s; and on their heads sat crowns like gold, while breast plates of iron covered their breasts, and tails like scorpions stabbed upward from their rear. And God! – the sound of their wings was like the sound of chariots of many horses running to battle.

She turned to run, but before she could even take a step, Fetustein grabbed her. Eat me! it screamed, and then stuck its entire hand into her mouth, nearly choking her until she was able to catch a breath or two from her nose. At first, the only sensation she was aware of was the overwhelming taste of chicken; but then she felt a strange tingling in her brain that eventually turned into a powerful feeling of goodness and love that both made her want to embrace it and vomit at the same time. The sensation, though, suddenly ceased, only to be replaced by a voice in her head: Wa Jie! Your work is nothing more than witchcraft! Man was made in my image, not a monkeys! Or do you think I am nothing more than a monkey?

This could all be explained by science, Wa Jie was sure. Perhaps the precise mixture of fetuses combined with her delicate touch at the mixing vat produced some type of quantum phenomenon, opening up a different dimension where fierce locust creatures and fetus-mix babies had evolved over billions of years. The baby must have drugged her with some type of hallucinogen to produce the effect of God telepathically communicating with her. God, she was a genius, even in the face of such fear and suffering. But then something happened to make her forget her brilliance: the locust creatures attacked. Each sting brought about the torment of a thousand scorpion stings, and she screamed in agony. Even as the creatures and Fetustein suddenly disappeared, her pain would not go away, leaving her writhing on the ground. God, God, how long was this going to last? But even though she asked the question, somewhere deep down within herself, she already knew the answer: 5 months.

The End


Blogger Des said...

Why 5 months?

9:44 PM  
Blogger Nathaniel said...

From the Book of Revelation -- "And they had tails like unto scoprions, and there were stings in their tails: and their power was to hurt men five months." -- specifically 9 Revelation 10.

It's a beautiful, thought provoking story, isn't it.

9:50 PM  
Anonymous Kia Isis Gaffikin said...

Uh, not really. Sounds more like a cheesy sci-fi movie to me.

10:01 PM  
Anonymous Kia said...

P.S. Please tell me you're just pulling all of our legs and you don't really believe all of this crap.

10:02 PM  
Blogger Nathaniel said...

kia -- really? just a science fiction movie? you don't see the larger point in it all, in this blog, in general? i have to say, in the month or so i've been doing this blog, i've been rather disappointed in those technologically advanced enough to use the internet, blog, etc. it really goes to show that science is evil.

10:13 PM  
Anonymous Kia said...

The larger point in it all, I think, is that you're either a nutburger or you have a very...bizarre sense of humor! But I will give you this: you've brought some much needed laughter in my life. My friends and I are having "loads" of fun with this!

10:19 PM  
Blogger Nathaniel said...

kia -- yet again i've been disappointed by the unbelievers' need to devide everything into categories of "nutburger" or humerous. i see now that witchcraft has completely destroyed your ability for reason and critical thinking. i would stop altogether, but i feel the Lord calling me to do His work via blogging.

10:28 PM  
Anonymous Elisabeth said...

close-mind·ed (klōs'mīn'dĭd, klōz'-) or closed-mind·ed (klōzd'-)

Intolerant of the beliefs and opinions of others; stubbornly unreceptive to new ideas.
close'-mind'ed·ness n.

EXAMPLE: "If you do not believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, and you do not accept Him as your savior, you will go to Hell."

10:44 PM  
Anonymous Kia said...

Excuse me? Witchcraft has destroyed "my" ability for reason and critical thinking? And this comes from the mouth of someone who can't even spell correctly, or use proper grammar? Now I know this blog is a joke!

If anyone on this site has had their ability for reason and critical thinking destroyed, its you and Parnell. And you're proving it more and more with every post.

10:51 PM  
Blogger Nathaniel said...

kia - this is an informal blog, so grammar and spelling aren't something that i've been focusing a great deal on. but fyi -- they have nothing to do with ability to reason or critical thinking. what if i were dislexic? then you'd be making fun of me. that's very offensive. in any event, i disagree, in general, with your idea that this blog proves my inability to think critically or reason; for it strictly follows the reasoning of the Bible and explores, critically, all that its words mean for the world of today -- no easy task considering it was written thousands of years ago. just because you disagree with my reasoning and way of thinking doesn't mean i can't do it.

11:13 PM  
Blogger Electric Grandmother said...

ha...she said nutburger
*Nutburger (nut-berg-er)n.
= An item of food shaped like a hamburger but made of [nuts].

Example: "The larger point in it all, I think, is that you're either a nutburger or you have a very...bizarre sense of humor!"

11:30 PM  
Anonymous Kia said...

Have you actually been diagnosed with dyslexia? If you have, then I apologize. But somehow I doubt it, since it would involve your going to a specialist, who is also a scientist and therefore, by your own definition, evil.

At any rate, your thinking is warped, and you've clearly forgotten many things about Jesus' life and teachings. What about loving your neighbor as yourself? Treating others as you want to be treated? Not casting the first stone? His friendship with Mary Magdalene--a woman, no less? Not sitting in judgement of other people? Loving your neighbor as yourself? Forgiveness? All of the positive things?

Everything you and Parnell focus on here is negative: hellfire, brimstone, the end times, and using the Bible as a weapon to beat others over the head! That isn't what Jesus wanted, and it isn't what he would do! And as I just told Parnell, Satan has no better advocate than someone who will take the Bible and twist it around to suit their own warped purposes, which is exactly what the two of you are doing!

This blog shouldn't be called, "Jesus Loves Everything." It should be called, "Jesus Hates Everything...and Everybody Except for Nathaniel and J.D. Parnell!" Attack of the Killer Fetuses! Give me a break!

11:50 PM  
Blogger Electric Grandmother said...

Jesus does love everything/everyone and so do Nathaniel and Parnell that's why they are trying to steer the readers, including YOU, into the past of Christ not eternal damnation!!!!
Nathaniel has not "forgotten the many wonderful things" but
, Don’t you see, he is trying to make everyone realize the way society proverbially pulls the wool over our eyes with the bible. The churches these days teach the "good" to our children, family and neighbors but not the "negative" in the way it should be taught.
Let me ask you this why would these "negative" things be in the bible if we were not suppose to teach them????
Praise be to Jesus! Alleluia!!

12:09 AM  
Blogger Des said...

Nathaniel - I totally skipped over the italics which lead me to ask an already answered question. Thank you, though.

I think you probably know by know that I do not exactly agree with the thoughts behind your stories. The prose itself is fairly good though; they are easy to read without being shallow or simple. It is interesting the absolute extremes you take things to. Is that because you truly believe that all scientists are only concerned with (as Wa jie is) only finding the monkey-human connection, or is that only for emphasis?

I still find your visualizations slightly grotesque. That and the women eating fetuses - it disturbs me, perhaps as it was meant to be.

I am getting to analytical and should stop now.

1:46 AM  
Anonymous Kia said...

The way I see it, Electric Grandmother, Nathaniel and Parnell are the ones trying to pull the wool over people's eyes with the Bible. They do this by using scare tactics in hopes of coherecing people, particularly teenagers, to their way of thinking. This is "not" the way to steer others from eternal damnation, but it is a tactic frequently used when gathering members for a cult.

I couldn't help but notice that you chose the name "The Electric Grandmother." I therefore assume you are familiar with "The Twilight Zone." Do you also recall the episode about the little man who accused everyone around him of being evil? Then he laughed and said that at 4 pm, all the evil people in the world would be no higher than two feet tall? Well, when 4 pm finally rolled around, it was the little man who was no higher than two feet tall; not the people he was accusing of being evil.

Sound familiar? What about the episode where the old man went hunting with his dog, and both of them drowned. As they were walking along, an "angel" invited the old man into "Heaven," but told him that the dog couldn't come. The old man refused, saying that if Heaven was too good a place for his dog, it was too good a place for him.

Later, as the old man and the dog continued to walk along together, he ran into another Angel who told him he was sent to take him into Heaven.

"How could that be," the old man asked. "Heaven is back yonder."

"Back yonder?" asked the angel. "You didn't get mixed up with that guy, did you?"

Then the angel told the old man that the "angel" he had spoken with before was actually the devil, and that the reason that he didn't want the dog to go through the gates is because the dog would smell the brimstone and alert the old man. Then he took the old man to the "real" Heaven, and assured him that his wife--a WOMAN, no less--would be much too smart to let the devil dupe her!

To me, these stories come much closer to the real teachings of Jesus than "Attack of the Fetuses" or "The Scientist, Fetustein, and the Locusts." I don't know what Nathaniel was playing at when he wrote them, but if its to convert others to his way of thinking it clearly isn't working. I flat refuse to worship any god who would create women simply to be baby factories and footstools for men, create animals for the sake of being slaughtered, would condemn an innocent child to an eternity in hell, or condemn anyone to the same simply for thinking or being differently! Personally I do NOT believe Jesus advocates these, not by a long shot! However, Nathaniel and Parnell apparently do, and furthermore they are using Jesus' name to propagate these beliefs-- which is, in essence, taking the Lord's name in vain.

The "negative" things are in the Bible because men who think like Nathaniel and Parnell put them there. They have very little to do with the true teachings of Christ, who said:

"For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.

For God sent his son not into the world to condemn it, but so that the world through him might be saved."

Think about it.

2:19 AM  
Blogger Electric Grandmother said...

Do you feel like you have taken crazy pills? Cause you sound like it.
p.s. Electric Grandmother was also a name of a cute little made-for-t.v. movie back in the 80's about a family who builds a robotic grandmother after the traumatic death of the mother.

7:57 AM  
Anonymous Kia said...

Hey, I know I'm crazy, but at least I admit it. Besides, who wants to be "normal" anyway? That's downright boring!

But anyway, I'm standing by everything I've said, and no threats of hellfire and damnation can change it.

1:32 PM  
Blogger Roberto Shamasio said...

Worst writing ever


For real, skip the bizaire imagery and make your piont in essay form. If you want to compre nazi deathcam experiments with stem cell research then please do

But fetus jello is not cool.

6:40 PM  
Blogger Nathaniel said...

roberto -- essay form can be good for some things, but others are just so terrible and tragic that only creativity can do them justice and really make the reader understand the suffering and hardship involved. plus God spoke to me and told me to write a short story. who am i to deny God's will?

6:49 PM  
Anonymous Cobra Commander said...

God spoke to you? Well, many people seem to deal with a plight in which they hear voices in their heads. It's called schizophrenia.

Scientists are evil? I even remember you referring to them as "evil demons from hell that want to misguide us from the path of God." That's a load of bullshit.
It's really interesting how religion isn't so accepting to science, yet science is accepting to religion. Many scientists believe there is a creator pulling the strings. Some are atheist; some are agnostic, and some are sure that God had an involvement within the creation of the universe. Like with most other decent people, they are accepting to one another's beliefs. (Of course, some scientists are assholes...but that's the same with religious people and atheists, etc. People are people. Some people are assholes, some people aren't.)

By the way, I remember another article of yours in which you said that heaven was outerspace. In other words, heaven is on the same plane, frequency, dimension or whatever you want to call it, as earth. I've yet to hear of any angels flying around in panic of being held for ransom by the devil. The devil apparently hasn't payed his bills. =/
Personally, I support the concept of metaphysics, which is the combination of science and spirituality. In my notion, everything is of a single consciousness--which all of us are apart of. That combined consciousness is God itself.

By the way, I'm a physicist, and I believe there's a God and perhaps another reality beyond this one; however, I don't believe in a Hell though. It was created some years after the teachings of Christ, and it is used as a way to scare people into converting.

If you want to be a christian, that's awesome. If that's your path to God, I support that; however, just stop being a close-minded asshole who thinks it isn't immoral to hit women.

You also have absolutely no idea about anything regarding science.
According to Darwin's Theory of Evolution, man never evolved from other species of apes. Man evolved from man. Man itself is a primate. Evidence--the DNA difference between chimpanzees and humans is 2%. Evolution has already been proven too. As a Christian, you most likely believe God can do anything. So, why couldn't he have made evolution? =/
Just because the DNA difference is extremely minimal doesn't mean we are monkies. It just means that we are primates.

Also, be sure to check out the the concepts of space-time, time as the fourth dimension, M-Theory, and metaphysics before you talk out of your ass again.

-Cobra Commander

4:40 PM  
Anonymous Cobra Commander said...

Also, everything in science is a theory--which are explanations with experimental evidence. That does not mean what we say or believe is absolutely factual information without question.

In science, you can question anything.

4:48 PM  
Anonymous Yarr! I am Grendel! said...

Arr! I am Grendel! I am Grendel! Yarr!! Ra ra ra I am GRENDEL!

Morals are conveyed by people who have brains. Someone obviously performed an abortion on your head. Lets take note that no scientist in their right mind would ever do this kind of thing, it's incredibly stupid, and the fact that he specifically used a woman because he's sexist. GRENDEL.
Grendel also speaks thusly: There are not very many scientists who support stem cell research. It's mostly selfish people with cancer or politicians, and yes there are a few ambitious scientists. A few. Grendel!!
Grendel must take his revenge of Beowulf now, for I am GRENDEL!

P.S. Why did the fetus taste like chicken??

10:46 PM  
Anonymous ZAC said...

Humans did not evolve from monkeys!!! How many times do people have to say it!!! I can see that you are a deep thinking person, but how can you not attack something if you don't know about it? If you are going to keep up this charade, then at least learn about MODERN evolution. That will explain to you what it really is so you can post stories that relate to evolution. Stop living in the past of information. Just look it up from Google and learn about your enemy.

P.S. What branch of Christianity are you?

3:13 AM  
Anonymous ZAC said...

I salute you for keeping to your beliefs, no matter how absurd they are, or how ever many people keep telling you otherwise.

3:16 AM  
Blogger Evolved Rationalist said...

If you think that this is what science and scientists are all about, you need to get an education.

No actual scientist would ever claim that man evolved from monkeys. Go back to remedial science class.

8:32 PM  
Anonymous ZAC said...

In this blog, I agree with Kia 100% and couldn't have said it any better myself; however, I must add that the parts of the bible that you are teaching are from a different time where there was almost no technological advances in science or technology. The only way to make sense of the world was through legends (enter religion). People were getting robbed, beat, murdered and hunted, and since taking revenge was contributing to the fighting, the people wanted someone to do it for them (enter god). The parts that you teach were set in the bible to keep people in line, and by staying in line, you were to get a reward (like a dog) enterance into "paradise." You also teach about god punishing "bad" people by sending them to "hell". This made the people feel better that even if someone did something bad, they would soon be punished. People not following that idea were themselves punished by other people because if you don't believe that, then you were more likely to comit crimes. Don't you see? These psychotic teachings of yours arose from scary, "evil" times in history. By the way, you are about 1500 years late in the crap that you speak. When these teachings were last spoken of, it was a terrible time for humanity. The Dark Ages!! Believing in what you believe in has happened before, and caused horrible results! Try to be normal, read the good parts of the bible and understand what Jesus was really trying to spread. Peace, love, health, loyalty and prosperity.

5:28 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Please answer me this!
How does does blending babies prove your point?

12:51 AM  
Blogger Mira said...

Dear Nathaniel:

This story is totally wrong. For one thing, according to all accounts (including a robot made to taste wine), humans taste like pork.



1:00 AM  
Anonymous Nathaniels mother said...

you make me so wet!!!!!!

9:02 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Nathaniel!!!!!! i will spank you when you get home from hunting for the lost souls.

9:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

1:42 AM  

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