Tuesday, June 13, 2006

A Christian Utopia

Well now, I sure did appreciate the great insights that Nathaniel had in previous posts concerning the use of humiliation as an effective tool for forcing people to live moral and godly lives. This is a most effective tool indeed! It would work well in practically all public venues: Public schools, churches, the justice system, the workplace, the home, the bedroom, and everywhere in between! You see, because of the Satanic tyranny of liberal activist judges, our government, at all levels, has become far too permissive. There are no longer any moral values codified in our public laws. This is unacceptable!!! Instead of laws that promulgate moral values and Christian virtues, our current system of laws instead promulgates a despicable burdensome Code of Regulations aimed at "protecting the public." Protecting them from what?!! Global warming? Pollution? Monopolies? Corporate Accounting "irregularities"? Securities fraud? HA!!! Every good Christian knows that these things don't exist!!! They are meaningless terms that were invented by liberals, communists, tree-hugging scientists, witches, and activist judges! The current system of laws and regulations is only effective at stealing money from the good, hard-working capitalists, who are God's favored people. Every good Christian knows that the only meaningful protection people need is the protection of the cross, so that they may be saved from eternal hellfire! And if anybody doesn't know this then they need to be brought in line! I believe that the shame and humiliation arising from public scrutiny of people's actions, as well as their thoughts and beliefs, is a most excellent tool for bringing people in line. And I believe the church can help accomplish this goal. Clearly, we must impose harsh corporal punishments in the public square for outright acts of sin and vice, or anything that degrades the moral values of the community, but this isn't nearly enough!!! Clearly, we must eventually find a way of monitoring people's innermost thoughts and beliefs, because your thoughts and beliefs are ultimately responsible for your actions. Therefore, I believe your actions, speech, beliefs, and innermost thoughts are all fair game for examination by the public, the government, and the church to determine of they ultimately degrade the common morality and wholesomeness of the community! So lets forget about this "protecting the public interest and environment" nonsense and instead focus all government authority on protecting the common morality! If we can prevent you from thinking unwholesome thoughts, than that would stop all forms of perversion, creativity, and non-conformist ideology. You may resent the idea of good and wise patriarchs such as myself monitoring your thought and beliefs. Well Tough!!! I don't care what you resent!!! And neither does the Lord!!! We are fighting a cultural war here people - A spiritual war!!! We are fighting a war for the soul of America!!! We can win this war by reorganizing our society into small Christian communities, centered around the community church, where everyone knows everyone, and everyone scrutinizes the actions and the speech of everyone, and talks to others constantly about these actions and speech. Good Christian women can be particularly useful in this regard. That way, any sign of immoral speech or non-conformist behavior will be quickly brought under public scrutiny, and it will be openly discussed and judged in the community, and in the public square, and in church, and that will ensure that any form of immorality or non-conformist behavior is quickly stamped out!!! Ah Yes! That is truly a grand vision of the most perfect Christian society. Just thinking about it inspires a poem....

Good morning good fellows,
What a glorious day!
Good morning Christian fellows,
Hold to virtuous ways!

Good fellows, have you heard?
Have you heard the latest word?
Betsy Ann McGhee,
Was terribly late for church!!

Betsy Ann McGhee,
Oh that Betsy Ann McGhee!
She has yet to find a husband,
Despite the age of twenty-three!!

May all good citizens take heed,
Of that Betsy Ann McGhee,
The church elders will be swift,
In punishing her misdeeds!!

Good Fellows, have you heard?
Have you heard the latest word??
That little sissy Joe Pea,
Wet his bed again last week!!

Sissy Joe Pea,
Oh sissy Joe Pea,
You were born terribly left handed,
And the town must punish thee!!

Have you heard?
Have you heard?
Have you heard the latest word??

Have you heard the latest word,
About Mrs. Francis Bittersby?
Her husband arrived home last week,
And the supper was not served properly!!

We must all sternly watch,
That Mrs. Francis Bittersby,
Lest she forget her proper role,
In the Christian family!!

Have you heard?
Have you heard?
Have you heard the latest word??


Blogger Wrin said...

Learn to spell and get a real degree, James. Maybe then someone here will take you seriously.

10:30 AM  
Blogger Nathaniel said...

wrin -- you're just certain the good doctor doesn't have a degree, but i assure you he does.

8:27 PM  
Blogger Wrin said...

You will have to present some very convincing evidence to ever assure me of such a thing. The "good doctor" doesn't even know how to spell, let alone have a degree.

8:51 AM  
Blogger Nathaniel said...

wrin -- i don't have to do anything, because it's not this goal in my life to convince you we are who we say we are. i NEVER lie, and i am comfortable knowing this for myself. all i can do is preach the Word of God the best I can, and He will do the rest.

as for the spelling, the good doctor and i are busy men. we try the best we can to get the message across, and neither of us have English or spelling degrees, so between having to balance our daily lives with the chores of this blog, along with our lack of English education means there are going to be spelling and grammatical errors. what's important, though, is that our readers understand what we are trying to say, and I think we've at least accomplished that.

9:03 AM  
Blogger Wrin said...

No, you don't get it. If you cannot prove your honesty even about your identity you will never convince us you are anything other than a hateful raving lunatic. Also, for Parnell to have a degree he would need to have passed English classes. He clearly has not.

11:05 AM  
Blogger Nathaniel said...

wrin -- no, i do get it. perhaps you are just beyond saving, so God has chosen to let my words fall on deaf ears.

11:35 AM  
Blogger Wrin said...

It's called trust.

9:42 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

*shudders* geez, you, sir, have issues. Punishing a kid for wetting the bed, or someone who isn't married at 23. That's nice. Real nice. I agree with you on some issues, but this. Ugh...

2:02 PM  

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