Sunday, October 09, 2005

The Jesus Loves Everything Superstore

Those of us that are not taken up to Heaven during the Rapture will be left behind to redeem ourselves in the eyes of the Lord. One of the many miseries we will have to face is the inability to trade without first getting the Mark of the Beast. It is important, then, to act now and establish a network Christian stores that can be taken underground when the Antichrist comes. So I propose that good Christians everywhere unite to start our very own Christian Wal-Mart -- Jesus Loves Everything Superstores. It will be just like Wal-Mart, but instead of Chinese sweatshops, the products will be made right here in the U.S.A.. We can hire only those that receive welfare checks and seek help from their church. We can institute a three times daily mandatory prayer session. Bible study will be offered. Every manager will be a minister, as well. But most importantly, all the profits the stores make can be invested in the underground network and the fight against the Antichrist, in general. When his day finally arrives, we will be incredibly prepared, with hidden warehouses of food and other goods we can circulate among Christians who have seen the light and await the Glorious Appearing. God will be pleased.

8 Comments:

Blogger Electric Grandmother said...

I love you

5:19 PM  
Blogger Nathaniel said...

Thank You. I can use all the love I can get -- we all can -- in this day of activist judges and their relentless promotion of the homosexual agenda and baby killers. I will only ask that you also pray for me, as I will pray for you.

6:24 PM  
Blogger Waitin' Til I Wed said...

I was looking for christian blogs and I found your site and I think what you say is totally true and I like that someone is brave enough to say it on a place like this. Everyone else here is so GODless and liberal and they are going to hell and I'm so happy that I know other people here think so too cause the WORD needs to be spread to the GODless sinners on blogspot. I will be posting lots and lots and I will support all your efforts and I hope that no one rude comes here and I will post rude things on their blog if they do.

JESUS AND THE LORD MY GOD WILL GUIDE US.

6:27 PM  
Blogger Des said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

12:15 AM  
Anonymous wallyworld said...

close-mind·ed (klōs'mīn'dĭd, klōz'-) or closed-mind·ed (klōzd'-)
adj.

Intolerant of the beliefs and opinions of others; stubbornly unreceptive to new ideas.
close'-mind'ed·ness n.

http://www.answers.com/closed-minded&r=67

EXAMPLE: "If you do not believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, and you do not accept Him as your savior, you will go to Hell."
http://jesusloveseverything.blogspot.com/2005/10/hell.html#links

11:15 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"...I hope that no one rude comes here and I will post rude things on their blog if they do. "

Ha ha ha ha ha, ha hee ha ha haha haaa, ahhha ha ha ha, snort, chuckle, ha ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha, ha hee ha ha haha haaa, ahhha ha ha ha, snort, chuckle, ha ha ha ha ha ha,ha ha ha ha, ha hee ha ha haha haaa, ahhha ha ha ha, chuckle ha ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha, ha hee ha ha haha haaa, ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha,ha ha ha ha, ha hee ha ha haha haaa, ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha, ha hee ha ha haha haaa, ahhha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha,ha ha ha ha, ha hee ha ha haha haaa, ahhha ha ha ha, snort, ha ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha, ha hee ha ha haha haaa, ha ha ha ha, ha ha ha ha ha ha,ha.

11:04 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

the "antichrist" was named by nortradomis..he say the futer...you know "witchcraft" ;P, and he said every thing he predicted could be avioded the antichrist doesn't have to happen but it will if we keep on the path we are on so buildding under ground labs of weapons...is most likely not the way to aviod it...and finaly the antichrist could be christain you know the 2nd one was...hitler was roman cathlic...just though you should know

1:10 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Maybe my wife and I will shop at your Jesus-mart. She can wear either a tight, low-cut halter top (which would show the pendant she wears: a silver pentagram) or one of her Madonna concert tees. My T-shirts lean mostly towards baseball, the NRA, and cars, but I think I can borrow a Black Sabbath shirt from a friend. failing that, I could always get a shirt for a local strip club.

5:04 PM  

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